Tag: duties

stealing time

A thief again,
i have been stealing
from my obligations
to other people
and giving time
to myself.

i hide away,contentment_alt
turn everything off
but the sweet stilling music.

Guilty like Robin Hood,
i steal from those tasks
that gobble up days in a mouthful
and give a few intimate hours
to mold a figure in clay,
to let these words
flow across the page.

Reality struck me like a blow
last Tuesday –
the ten thousand chores
on a dozen to-do lists before me
will never go away.
One task accomplished,
three rise in its place.
Requests and demands
will always come
like moths to a flame,
the light of energy and ability
being irresistible.

i have to learn to say no.

Even better,
i must learn to state
“not now”
with singular clarity and purpose.

In my heart, i begin to believe
that i am fully valuable,
deserving of peace and art.
Even without that justification,
the results are profound:
after a few quiet hours,
i feel restored.

Even the mountains of toil
for the benefit of others
do not feel as heavy
with ink staining my hands.

eating elephants or moving mountains

A friend of mine works as a life coach and told me once (free advice I should have paid quite a lot for) that one cannot eat an elephant in one bite.  The elephant must be consumed in small nibbles, working methodically, until the entire beast is digested.  Now, this was understood to be a proverbial elephant, since at the time I was a vegetarian, but the analogy helped.  As we talked, my imagination met her image with another, the one I had been using for years: I felt like I was trying to move a mountain larger than Everest with a weak and rusty spoon.

Either way, no matter which picture works, I find great satisfaction in the burp after that large meal or while one rests a very weary arm from shifting that much dirt and stone.  I close in on some wonderful changes.  By the time this blog is released into the wild, I should have finished quite a few.

My website has been recoded.  On various pages, you can purchase items straight from the website itself – in particular bookmarks, prints, poem posters and some paintings.  For now, sculptures and pottery will be mostly showcased on my ebay store, better suited to rapid turn-around.  Trust me, uploading those items and the altered website was a labor of both love and frustration.  My geriatric computer did not like the task at all, and let me know it.  {Indeed at the time of this writing, I am still working on the painting section of the website!}

Other bits of elephant are less visible, but probably caused more indigestion.  Since my ‘part time’ job is website coding and some graphic design, I’ve been happy to get projects done for clients.  The book-keeping is done, with only the last bits of inventory hanging over my head as I type (but that should be done before this blog is released.)  This brings such relief to me.  However, as I looked back at entries I wrote less than a month ago, talking about looming to-do lists and the intimidation of it all, I realized today’s entry deserved to be: proof that over time, even the most distractible of people (myself) can get things done albeit slowly.